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The 5 Love Language Challenge

The 5 Love Language Challenge

Learning your partner’s love language is one of the most important things you can do for your relationship. Not only that, but it is the quickest way to create lasting and meaningful change in your marriage. Learning a new love language is one of the easiest things to learn and implement and it makes such a huge difference immediately. The Love Language Challenge is simple and fun. For the next 5 days, experiment with one love language per day. Below are some suggestions of creative ways to implement each one. After the 5 days is over, evaluate what your partner responded to the strongest. Voila…you have your partner’s primary love language. Once you know that, you can start filling their cup on the regular.

Day 1: Quality time

Quality time does not take a lot of time, but it does require focused attention. Spending quality time with the one you love means the activity is secondary to being together. Learn and practice good listening techniques and strive to help your partner feel heard and understood. Here are a few things for you to try on Day 1 of this challenge.


Day 2: Words of Affirmation

Words of Affirmation come in all forms. You can express them verbally or in written form. You can give them in public or in private, directly to your loved one or in front of them to someone else. The idea behind words of affirmation is help your partner feel loved, appreciated and seen. Here are some suggestions to try on day 2 of this challenge.

Day 3: Receiving Gifts

Gifts can come in many shapes and sizes. They can be store bought, found in nature or handmade with love. Don’t forget that your physical presence can be a powerful gift as well. The idea here is to give your partner a physical token of your love and affection to remind them that you are thinking about them, even when they aren’t with you. Here are some suggestions to try on day 3 of this challenge.

Day 4: Acts of Service

Acts of Service are physical acts that show your partner you love them and you want to help them. It’s taking an action that speaks louder then any words possibly could. Think about ways you could lighten their load or help them accomplish something they don’t enjoy or takes a lot of their time. Acts of service are thoughtful and there are so many possibilities. Here are a few suggestions to try during day 4 of this challenge.

Day 5: Physical Touch

Physical touch is just like it sounds, touching each other. These touches can be sexual in nature or they don’t have to be. Research shows that human beings crave physical affection and touching can communicate love and tenderness between two people. Here are some fun suggestions for day 5 of this challenge.

And finally, after you can completed one full day of experimenting with each of the 5 love languages, simply ask your partner if there was anything you did in the last week or so that made them feel really loved. Chances are they will list a few of the things you did and overlook the rest. Don’t be put off by this. Sometimes, we spend time and effort showing love to our spouses in a language they don’t understand. Many times, however, they will appreciate your efforts in several of the different languages. By asking a series of follow up questions, you should be able to decipher your spouse’s primary love language. I guarantee, if you spend the next few months learning to show love in this language, your efforts will be recognized and reciprocated and the quality of your marriage will improve exponentially.

I would love to hear about your experiences with this challenge. You can email me at: or join our Facebook group here:



About the author, Monica

I'm a wife and mother of 4 wonderful, talented children. I started a podcast for people who are ready to uplevel their lives in the areas of physical, spiritual, mental and emotional health. I will be sharing real, authentic life experiences that have taught me about living On the Brighter Side.

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