10 ways to “enhance” your romance in the bedroom from us (and our friends and partners)…anonymously

Fashion & Beauty

10 Ways To “Enhance” Your Romance In The Bedroom: From Us (And Our Friends And Partners)…Anonymously

Drescription

Welcome to our first anonymously written post, mostly because our partners made us promise. We’ve toyed with doing this at EHD as a way to keep our privacy (and privacy of our partners/family/friends) while being able to dive into what we really talk about in the office. Valentine’s Day is approaching and most of us don’t want diamonds, all we really want is a way to connect more. You know, to feel in love with our partner. And a side of butterflies wouldn’t hurt. Rumor has it that sex can get stale. It can even start to feel like an obligation, another box to check, after years of marriage and especially after having kids. But intimacy is SO important, and sex is how a lot of couples feel that intimacy. So in addition to the usual “For Him/For Her” gift guide (stay tuned), this year we’ve crowdsourced from all the women we know (and some men) ways/ideas/products to help bring some romance back, excite us a bit, and to help us “connect” more with our partners in the bedroom. Life is long so why not put some effort in and keep having some fun.

*Please note that these are direct quotes from our ANONYMOUS friends and selves about stuff they/we LOVE and have worked for them/us. Everyone will be anonymous, mostly to save partners from embarrassment from their moms who likely read this blog.

**And a warning – While we think these suggestions are about getting romantic, connecting and having fun in healthy consensual relationships, we also suggest that Emily’s parents (or those that might feel uncomfortable talking about sex) stop reading right here. :)

1. Dispea Podcast: “If you like reading romance novels (me!!) and like listening to podcasts (me!!) then throw on this erotic, not cheesy, story podcast after crawling into bed and see if it works. In my experience just turning it on, turns us on. However, my male partner wants to note that this is more for women than men. I countered with, ‘well, if it works for women isn’t it also for men if you know what I mean?’ He concurred. But be warned that perhaps both partners might not like these stories equally.”

2. The Spicer App: “This app is so fun. It presents activities and ideas and lets you “like” the things you would feel comfortable doing (separately from your partner, so you can answer as honestly as possible). Once you’re both done you get a list, but only see the activities that both you and your partner both “liked”. You can play “dares” or just see what you both are into. It’s fun and just the act of filling out the questions gets us both excited.”

3. Modern and Pretty Lingerie: Duh. But, a lot of us struggle with lingerie because not only can it be actually unflattering, but there is something so “come hither” cheesy about it – almost like putting on a costume, which sure, can be fun but feels kinda false for a regular basis. Historically lingerie brands have done anything BUT empower women, instead they have been another cog in the objectification machine and been a huge source of body shaming. We found Lonely Label lingerie on Instagram and it looks so pretty and modern. Please note all the beautiful women on their site are of many different sizes, shapes, colors, and ages. EXACTLY. Goodbye Victoria Secret.

4. OMGYES: “I found out about “OMGYES” through an Instagram ad, prominently featuring a photo of Emma Watson (who is a big supporter of the site). Think of it like Skillshare for the big O. You pay a one-time fee, which grants you access to an entire archive of informative and eye-opening videos from women of all ages, sharing their experiences and techniques. It’s not porn, and it’s not just text-based articles with diagrams. It’s kinda like chatting in your living room with your best friends, except your best friends are women’s pleasure experts. Learning about your own sexual pleasure only benefits your relationship and a lot of us weren’t taught ANYTHING. Let’s all get more informed.”

5. Eva II: “This discreet and insanely pleasurable little guy changed our sex life. If you feel like you have a hard time ‘getting there’ when having sex, this will make that a non-issue. But if you don’t want to make that investment, multiple women highly recommended this. Also I haven’t tried this but would sure love it – can anybody recommend it?”

6. Take a Sexy Photo: “Whenever I feel a little unsexy and perhaps slightly insecure about my looks I find that taking a naked or sexy mirror pic makes me feel like a new woman. A lot of the times I don’t even share the photos with my partner (but that can help set the mood, too). I just find that simply giving myself space and opportunity to love myself helps open me up to express that love with my partner. But if you do feel comfortable sharing this with your partner, it can be fun and exciting to throw on some lingerie and have them take some photos of you. Don’t be afraid to treat yourself like you are an exquisite masterpiece – because you are.”

7. Pop on a Steamy Movie Or TV Show: We’re not talking porn. Most women (and men) know the power of “The Notebook”, but a lot of guys don’t necessarily feel cool pressing play on that one. But there are some shows and movies that are less, “50 Shades of Ryan Gosling on a ferris wheel,” and more “Rugged Scottish warriors and vampires”. Our favorites are Outlander, True Blood, and even Dirty Dancing.

8. Turn Up Some Music: “This may be the oldest trick in the book. And when we say music – think romance, not sex. We’ve always struggled with selecting that right music choice. While I don’t mind ‘Let’s Get It On’ on the dance floor, there is something too ‘on the nose’ about it in the bedroom. This is highly specific per each couple out there, but I almost suggest more thinking about it romantically. One example: Play ‘your song’ – the one you did for your first dance.”

9. Pamper Yourself Into The Mood: “Everyone has different things that make them feel sexy. For me, feeling relaxed, soft, and smooth make me feel very sexy. I love taking a warm bath (with a candle because sometimes a cliche works) and using Frank Body Scrub to get my skin super soft and smooth. Then when I get out I like to use Fur Oil (actually TWO people swore by this) and then throw on something comfortable but that shows off all my soft skin, like a satin set.”

10. Celebrate Your Partner, Publicly and Privately: “This is coming from me, Emily Henderson, not anonymous. I think that making your partner feel like they are the best, not just with an ‘I love you’ but really letting them know why, what is it about them that you love, why are they so great is the best way to feel connected. And don’t be afraid to call out physical attributes – men like to be complimented as much as women.”

Now we’d love to hear from you. What makes you feel good and empowered in the bedroom? Let’s talk about sex (and romance), baby.

Shopping For Dining Chairs…Consider A Curved-Back Option (Wisdom From A Pro Stylist)

Shopping for dining chairs isn’t easy! There are SO many options where even the “most affordable” ones still add up to A LOT of money because you at least need four for most dining tables. But Emily discovered one easy way to narrow your search…The curved-back chair. There’s honestly no downside. They feel great to sit on, you can comfortably converse with the person next to you, AND they look great. Why do they look great, do you ask? Well, if you know us, you know we love to mix and match shapes (ie. you don’t want all squares or all curves in one space). What a curved-back chair does, especially for a rectangular table, is nicely contrast that shape. Your guests will ask you if you hired a designer! Isn’t that what we all really want?? But the truth is you are just smart and learned all this good design advice for free, here:) It’s all about visual interest baby (and comfort)! This green mohair dining chair from Crate & Barrel was an INSTANT love match for Emily and her sunroom. It’s also what really made her “team curved-back” dining chair after getting some real use out of them. Sure, they are clearly beautiful, but more than that, they are so comfortable to sit in. And I can attest to that! I usually sit in that middle one on the right (my unofficial farmhouse sunroom work chair). So while this table is a pill shape and isn’t technically a rectangle, there are SO many other straight, graphic lines in this room. These chairs really soften the overall look. Then when you want to chat with the person next to you, that little curve gives you a really comfortable armrest. 10/10! So in hopes of helping you find a functional AND beautiful dining chair. Here are our favorites online right now: Sienna Boucle Dining Armchair Let’s start out real strong with what looks (and is rated high) to be a beautiful and comfortable dining chair! The color is gorgeous and also comes in three other more neutral options. At $399 it’s not cheap (few good dining chairs are) but it is a stunner and a bestseller so that is saying something, right?! Also, it could easily be a great accent chair:) Malin Whitewash Ash Wood Dining Chair A modern take on the classic wishbone that I truly love. The light ash wood is so pretty with that natural flecked wool-blend fabric (which also looks very forgiving with spills). The curved back may not be upholstered but I’ve sat in wishbone chairs because and love how they feel. Originally, this chair was $349 but Crate & Barrel is having a Dining Room Event (aka a good sale) so right now this puppy is $279 each. Oh, and it’s made from sustainable wood! Dame Dining Chair Back to upholstered backs! If you know me you know I love this one. The scale of the tubular back is slim and chic but still looks substantial enough to be comfortable for maximum eating and conversation time around the dining table! While this cutie is $648 each, it’s a very special and unique chair. If you go to the product page and see it in people’s homes you’ll see what I mean. Inesse Boucle Dining Chair Modern and moody! This is the same fabric in a different color as the first one but this one is clearly more sleek and minimal. I also think the style and color are wildly versatile and can work with a ton of different home styles. This cutie comes in at $379 with a 4.6-star rating! Mathilde Leather Dining Chair What a vintage Shaker-inspired stunner. But I also feel like the design very much took cues from the Scandinavian vintage dining chairs we saw Em considering for the farmhouse. Honestly, it makes total sense since the style/vibe of Emily’s house is Scandinavian Farmhouse:) It’s also a beautiful dining chair that looks comfortable and is easy to clean up with that leather seat. Carlyle Dining Chair More leather and more modern shapes! This pricey ($995) but beautiful chair would elevate anyone’s home. It’s current yet timeless at the same time. I just think it’s the coolest. Orion Luxe Dining Chair I found an affordable AND colorful option at $100 a pop! Target came through with a simple, luxe, and fun dining chair. A gently curved back with a gentler piece tag. It also comes in cream and green however those colors seem to be sold out online but you can check back for them. Lennox Karissa Dining Chair Man, I love this one too! Very similar to Emily’s chairs but the wooden, darker, warmer version. Look at that joinery detail that says “modern” instead of “only farmhouse”. The seat also comes in a cream but I feel like this color is a bit more forgiving. Both are beautiful though. Love the options! Solid Real Wood Leather Cushion Elbow Dining Chair Another vintage-inspired piece that is made from real wood and is still only $269 (I know that is still a lot but it’s a great price for a piece like this). It also comes in a few different colors if you love the shape but want another tone. Rimrow Dining Chair I clearly needed to add in some other materials so rattan it is! This chair truly looks like it’s giving you a hug and how the seat is shaped also looks really comfortable. It comes in this natural color, black as well as white, and is $520 each. It would add not only that beautiful contrasting shape but also help you mix in another texture into your home! Valissa Armchair For this one, it’s a little less rattan and a little more cushion which is nice for you and your guests. It’s neutral but still interesting and again looks really comfortable chair! The price tag of $600 isn’t nothing but if you have the budget and want a beautiful chair, this could be it. Lana Curved Back Dining Chair Another far more affordable option at $130! No assembly is required and this sleek but rounded design is perfect for almost every home. It also comes in a light wood:) Raleigh Dining Arm Chair Yikes, I also love this one. You can lean back with extra cushion and comfort, the frame wood is kiln-dried which they say makes it sturdier, and it’s gorgeous. Not the cheapest but not the most expensive at $449. Reid Wood Upholstered Dining Chair (Set of 2) How good is that wood detail under the arms? It’s super simple but a nice touch. This one also comes in a handful of other colors and for two chairs it costs $750. Frederique Cerused Natural Oak Wood Upholstered Dining Side Chair This one might be cheating because calling this a curved-back dining chair is a stretch but look how COOL it is. The shape of the back is too good and that dark mauve color is just to die for. This chair comes in at $349. That’s it for curved back chairs! More than anything I hope this helps you think about mixing shapes and profiles when designing a room. This is a great start if you are in the market. Love you, mean it.

This Is How Often You Should Really Deadhead Petunias for Healthier Blooms, According to Gardeners

Petunias are known for their vibrant, trumpet-shaped blooms and long flowering season, making them a staple in many home gardens. But to keep these colorful plants looking their best, regular maintenance is key, especially when it comes to deadheading. Removing spent flowers not only improves the plant’s appearance but also encourages more blooms throughout the season. So, how often do you really need to deadhead your petunias? We turned to gardening pros for the answer. Meet the Expert Julia Omelchenko is the resident botany expert at Plantum, a plant care and gardening app that helps identify plants and improve plant care. Kelly Funk is an experienced gardening expert and the President of Jackson & Perkins, an online plant nursery specializing in roses and other garden plants. Why Is Deadheading Important? When a plant’s flowers start to fade, it signals to the plant that it’s time to direct its energy into producing seeds. Deadheading disrupts this process and naturally extends the blooming season by removing the spent flower altogether, thereby redirecting the plant’s energy from seed production to producing more flowers. Not all flowering plants require deadheading, but many benefit from it, especially annuals like petunias. If you want your petunias to bloom all summer, deadheading is the way to do it. How Often Should You Deadhead Petunias? According to gardening pros, it’s best to deadhead petunias regularly to encourage more blooms and prevent them from going to seed. The frequency will vary slightly depending on your climate and the cultivar you have, but in general, you can expect to be deadheading your petunias at least once a week. “Ideally, petunias should be deadheaded at least once a week, but checking on them a few times a week is better, especially during peak bloom periods," says Kelly Funk, President of Jackson & Perkins. "I recommend making it part of your routine when watering or doing other tasks." Some petunia cultivars, such as Wave petunias and Supertunias, are bred to be self-cleaning, meaning they don’t require deadheading to encourage more blooms. Still, according to Julia Omelchenko, resident botany expert at Plantum, it’s best to prune these varieties occasionally to maintain their shape and stimulate vigorous growth. If deadheading your petunias multiple times a week sounds like a lot of work, we have good news for you: deadheading is super easy to do, and will only take you a couple of minutes to complete. The key is to ensure you’re doing it properly. How to Deadhead Petunias Deadheading involves removing the entire flower head once it starts to wilt. This includes the petals, the peduncle, and the receptacle. Basically, you want to remove the entire trumpet-shaped flower, including the green base that attaches it to the stem. This can be done by hand, or using sterilized scissors or pruning shears. “It’s important to deadhead properly by removing not just the petals but also the green base of the flower," Omelchenko says. "If you only pull off the petals, the plant will continue to produce seeds in the ovary." Additional Petunia Care Tips for Continuous Blooms Besides regular deadheading, there are a few other ways you can encourage your petunias to bloom all summer. Ensuring they have adequate light (full sun) and water (soil shouldn’t dry out completely) is the first step. Funk also recommends fertilizing your petunias every two weeks to help support vigorous growth. Finally, our experts say it’s common for petunias to start looking leggy by mid-summer, even if you’re deadheading regularly. To facilitate bushy growth, they recommend a light pruning to help tidy the plant. Not only will you be rewarded with fresh, compact growth, but you’ll also get a flush of new blooms.

10 Early Black Friday Luggage Deals That’ll Convince You to Retire Your Old Suitcase—Up to $460 Off

Whether you’re visiting family or jetting off on a beach vacation, the holiday travel season is officially here. There’s nothing worse than getting ready for a trip and realizing your suitcase’s wheel is broken or your biggest bag isn’t quite big enough, especially if you’ve waited until the last minute to pack (and let’s be honest, most of us do). Get ahead of the game this year and shop these early Black Friday luggage deals to ensure your packing and travels go smoothly. You can save up to a whopping $460 on luggage right now before Black Friday even arrives. Snag Away luggage, a Samsonite suitcase set, a Vera Bradley duffel bag, and more for up to 73 percent off. Read on to shop early Black Friday deals on luggage below. Best Early Black Friday Luggage Deals Away The Carry On, $206 (was $275); awaytravel.com. Samsonite Cosmolite 3.0 2-Piece Set, $690 (was $1,150); shop.samsonite.com. Calpak Stevyn Duffel Bag with Shoe Compartment, $90 (was $112); calpaktravel.com. Vera Bradley Original Duffel Bag, $50 (was $80); verabradley.com. Calpak Terra 45-Liter Carry-On Luggage, $154 (was $385); calpaktravel.com. Away The Carry On The Carry On is Away’s smallest suitcase that’s designed to fit about three to five days’ worth of clothes. At 21.7 by 14.4 by 9 inches and 7.5 pounds, the bag is lightweight and fits in the overhead bin of most major airlines. It features a TSA-approved combination lock and 360-degree rotating wheels that won’t slow you down. The carry-on suitcase’s interior also has multiple pockets to keep things organized and buckle straps for compression. Samsonite Cosmolite 3.0 2-Piece Set This Samsonite luggage set includes an extra large and a carry-on suitcase. The Cosmolite bags are extremely lightweight at just 3.7 pounds for the carry-on and 7.7 pounds for the large size. Both suitcases have TSA-compliant combination locks, zippered interior compartments, and crossed straps to prevent items from shifting in transit. Calpak Stevyn Duffel Bag with Shoe Compartment For short trips, grab this compact weekender bag. The coolest feature is the back sleeve that keeps it attached to your suitcase handle, so you don’t have to wrangle multiple bags while traveling. Thanks to the inside and outside pockets, you’ll be able to keep all your belongings organized. The duffel bag even has a bottom compartment for items you want to keep separate, like shoes or dirty laundry. Vera Bradley Original Duffel Bag This classic Vera Bradley duffel bag is a fan-favorite for a reason; the nylon material is durable enough to last through years of manhandling while traveling (some patterns are also available in equally durable cotton garbardine). The spacious bag has interior and exterior pockets and sturdy shoulder straps. Reviewers love using the duffel for overnight and weekend trips and for heading to the gym. Calpak Terra 45-Liter Carry-On Luggage This softside suitcase’s water-resistant, ripstop polyester fabric will stand up to wear and tear from traveling. Though it’s carry-on sized, the bag expands up to 2 additional inches, making it perfect for overpackers. It has a 17-inch padded laptop sleeve and multiple pockets on the inside and outside of the bag, too. With 360-degree rotating wheels, the suitcase is easy to maneuver, as well. Away The Weekender Snag this sleek bag for quick weekend trips or for carting around your gym clothes. Like the larger Away luggage, it has mesh compartments to organize the inside of your bag, including a 16-inch laptop pocket. The duffel has top handles and a removable padded strap that won’t dig into your shoulder, and the wraparound zipper makes it easy to access all your packed items. Delsey Paris Large Expandable Spinner If you’re headed on a longer vacation, this large hardside suitcase is what you need. The expandable bag has two packing compartments with a divider and straps to keep clothing in place, and it has a TSA combination lock. Plus, it’s easy to roll thanks to the four spinner wheels and adjustable telescopic handle. Lands' End Waxed Canvas Travel Duffel Bag Use this stylish duffel bag as a carry-on or as a gym bag. Made of waxed canvas, it features leather accents, a cotton lining, and a removable padded shoulder strap. You can shop it in navy and brown colorways, and the best part is that it’s machine washable to easily clean it if it gets dirty during your travels. Skonyon 3-Piece Hardside Checked Spinner Luggage Set This three-piece luggage set includes a 20-inch, a 24-inch, and a 28-inch bag, so you’ll have an appropriately sized suitcase for any kind of trip. The hardside bags are made of water- and scratch-resistant polycarbonate, and they have a durable aluminum telescoping handle. They also have multiple inside pockets and straps to keep your belongings from moving around too much. The suitcases can be nested to save storage space, too. Samsonite UpLift Softside Large Spinner This large 33-by-21.25-by-13.5-inch suitcase can be made even bigger with the expandable zipper to accommodate everything you need to pack. One of the niftiest aspects is that it has an interior pocket that can be accessed from the outside to quickly grab anything that’s stored away. The suitcase’s handle can be adjusted to multiple heights, which means you won’t have a handle that’s too high or low to comfortably manage. It even comes with a removable wet pouch for toiletries.

My Brother’s Beautiful Guest Bedroom – A Warm and Modern Retreat

Iwouldn’t exactly say Ken asked for a pink and dare I say purple guest bedroom but here we are (and we all really love it). But the thing is, bedrooms are my favorite, and guest rooms (and kids’ rooms) are my most favorites – you can lean into an idea, a theme, or a style without as many functional constraints (like living rooms or even “storage” stuff with everyday used grownup bedrooms). It’s a luxury for sure, and one that we had so much fun designing – AND IT WAS SO EASY!! We pitched this to AllModern, and almost everything in the room is from them. They hand-vet their designs for quality and pretty much everything was delivered fast + free. See? Easy. So let’s take a tour :) We started by choosing the perfect bed – we needed a bed that would be low, i.e. a platform that didn’t have a high headboard blocking the window. I loved that the Liza Upholstered Bed from AllModern not only checked that box, but the shape of the headboard complements the more rigid squared-off window and is a softer transition in front of that big square. The fabric is a really warm light caramel that works as a neutral (that I think could go with so many color palettes). It also comes in a few neutral boucle fabrics as well. And BTW the bed was super easy to put together, FYI – just clips into place. The rest of the room came together in textures and tones with a few bolder patterns. The blackout curtains are so excellent – They are 100″ wide and 108″ long which fit this room almost perfectly (there is a bit of a puddle behind the bed) and the width of them made it so easy to cover the huge window. Shout out to our Rowena rug, which we chose because it gave a nice graphic, but simple pattern and a bit of lightness and balance to the room. The nightstands are simple, but we chose them for the mixed material (marble and walnut) and we liked the depth of the wood tone (versus just choosing white oak). I felt that this room could handle deeper, warmer tones since it got the least amount of natural light and was tucked away in the house. The nightstands are super heavy and solid, FYI – if you are into high-quality furniture (and need two people to move them) just know we are so impressed with these. The lamps are also really heavy (cement) and brought a pretty texture to the room, as well as a graphic shape of the lamp. It’s likely time to talk about the paint color which I didn’t realize I’ve used before!! It’s called Cocoa Berry by Sherwin-Williams and I just LOVE it because I randomly chose it twice (our powder bath too). It’s a really warm dark mauve that can definitely lean towards “purple”, although we try not to use that word because people have FEELINGS about purple, but this color is just gorgeous. The incredible painting is by MaryAnn Puls – they bought it from the OG Portland project years ago. It works so well in the family room downstairs, but once we brought it up here I knew we had to hang it. All the bedding and pillows are from AllModern (I also love that brown-toned pillow from the Chris Loves Julia collection on Wayfair). The room really came together so quickly – we chose the paint color last, which is not how everyone’s process works, but in my mind it’s the easiest way to do it. Choose the furniture or conversation pieces first (like the bed, rug, and art) because there are more color limitations on those things, and then make the paint color work with those (not the other way around). The architect, Anne Usher, designed all of the bedrooms to have bench niches in them so we added this beautiful Pollack fabric for the bench cushion – the deep blue felt like a really pretty complement to all the warmer pinks (and we used the green colorway in the dining room so its a call back to that). I truly LOVE how this bedroom turned out so much – the colors, tones, textures and the overall vibe really hit a 10/10 of cozy. And yet it’s so livable, comfortable, and inviting. It’s an absolute retreat of a room, and perhaps we’ll be crashing here after many a summer BBQ gone rogue :) A huge thanks to AllModern for partnering on this room and making it all so easy with excellent modern furniture and decor that mixes so well together. AllModern keeps things simple with hand-vetted modern collections. Their designs are made for real life (which I can attest to!) and are made to stand the test of time.